Tricia Shore - Comic Mom

Thank you, Federal Communications Commission. Your threats to fine radio chain Clear Channel Communications for indecency convinced them to drop Howard Stern's program last month. That means that I can visit six U.S. radio markets free from worrying about my three-year-old and 15-month-old sons being forced to listen to Stern. The world is, of course, a much better place now.

Why stop with Howard Stern? Why not fine commercial television programming that carries advertisements targeted to children? Why not stop television programming that shows any type of violence or sex? As a mother, should I not be campaigning to rid the airwaves of all indecency and to make sure that all programming is as pure as "Mister Rogers' Neighborhood"? But then again, there was that phallic trolley going through the tunnel.

What started the current wave of parents and others begging for government control of the airwaves was a few seconds of overexposure for Janet Jackson in the Super Bowl half-time show. I avoid the Super Bowl as if it were a "Girls Gone Wild" marathon, but if my sons had seen the breast, they would not have been alarmed. My older son would have probably asked if Jackson's infant was hungry.

I admit that I have not listened to Stern since before I had children, but that's my choice. My children have no idea who he is. By the time they do, perhaps they will have the good taste to turn him off. But the government has no business doing so.

Many moms claim that giving birth has somehow made them aware of just how much the government needs to regulate the airwaves. Becoming a mom has not changed my mind about government censorship. I don't want the government to regulate what comes into my home because my sons' father and I control this content ourselves.

Some images on the five o'clock news are way too scary for my sons and, frankly, I turn off the television or change the channel when those scenes occur. I'll admit to watching Jimmy Kimmel, Dave Chappelle, and the occasional "Reno 911," but here's a novel idea: these shows are all on after the lights are out for my children.

Perhaps we should not be surprised that many parents do not want to control media content in their homes. Parents regularly trust day care teachers to raise their children and then transfer this trust to public schools for teaching their children. It is no wonder that many parents want the Federal Communications Commission to take over responsibility for the media content that comes into their homes and automobiles.

Soon, all that may be left of parental responsibility is placing the little darlings' pictures on workplace computer screen savers and paying for college. Having given away every other responsibility, parents will merely need to sit around, write the occasional check, and look smug.